Here’s the problem with most MMORPGs, and by severe but not superfluous tangent what will also make Wii a unique and revolutionary product, is that those kinds of games presuppose and requires a certain vocabulary and skill set to play the game and do not represent a fantasy world that one can escape to, which used to be the point of games in general before they became mass-produces and marketed like Hollywood movies. I know what some of you are thinking– “What the fuck are you talking about?”
Well, if you really want it spelled out for you because you’re either thirteen years old and/or are used to vapid conversations comprised largely of acronyms and typed in a chat window in Trillian or WoW, what I mean to say is just that: games like this have been taken over by loser and socially inept teens that have nothing better to do than sit in their parents’ basement wallowing in smug self-satisfaction at how much Gold they have. Well I hate to break it to you, folks. No one cares. Games used to be about an escape, and what prevents me from getting into many online games are two simple facts. If I am going to invest that much time into learning an entirely new lifestyle, vocabulary, language and environment, I think I’d rather be in another country rather than talking to the likes of you. Which brings us to fact number two. You’re playing the game, too. And I don’t really like you. You’re too young, you play the game better than me, and you’re an idiot. Talk to me in ten years once you know what your sexual orientation is, once you actually have a job, once you stop sniffing black markers to get high.
I am filled with joy and cynicism at the idea of playing Star Trek Online. The cynical side of me is worried that the game is simply too good to be true, that it will never be finished, that it is too complex to market, and that it will be overrun by preteens. The joy is obvious. Here is a game that follows the same rules of a world I already know, a world I inadvertently invested years learning about, caring about. And with that comes hope that this world can live forever, and not just in those seven precious seasons of TNG. The trick, which can’t be stated enough, is that they have to do it right. Leave me alone in my quarters or in Ten Forward, let me take my vakay on Risa. And don’t follow the same rules of every other MMORPG. Take a cue from Nintendo and forge your own path, don’t compete on their level, and create something new, what this genre of game should have become, something between The Sims and Diablo with a twist of Patrician. And if you don’t happen to agree, then this game probably will suck and you won’t like it. Which is just as well. I’d rather see this game live and die for its uniqueness than for being just another hack teenie MMORPG jerk-off parade.